you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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