I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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