Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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