Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
