I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
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