Redeem this text for a blowjob
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
