Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
