I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
