Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
