does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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