Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
