I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Randomize
