he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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