He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
