my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
