marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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