fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
