butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
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