So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
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