I didn't shave. On purpose
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
