What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Randomize
