took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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