Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
