i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize