if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
