About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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