The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Randomize
