He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
apparently the secret to your success is patron
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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