there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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