I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
My life is pants optional.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
