you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize