I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
