I love black thongs
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Panties = found
Randomize
