Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Me too!
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
