How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Randomize
