she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
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