i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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