do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
