No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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