Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
