rhymes with "ouble enetration"
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
