Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
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