I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
