sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
