Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
