I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
