He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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