I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
