And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Two words: blizzard sex
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize