I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
